Sunday, August 31, 2003.


arrggghhh!!! i have an assignment to hand in tomorrow (which i didnt know about til yesterday) and its half done...and then i have a chem test tomorrow..and then i have two bio reports to hand in next week...scrap that..not hectic sunday but monday and tuesday and wednesday!!! :s last night i was at my neighbours place... it was quite ok.. ate lotsa sausages...they were yummy! happy (belated) birthday to Rach and Sheena! today i'm gonna pack everything real tight..i have to go to GB meeting i'll bring my chem and do it while the girls are having games :) hope i can finish it :) i'm gonna get out of my jammies now :) then have my lunch...byee!

12:23 PM

Friday, August 29, 2003.


yes, i'm still hooked on that song :) been doing a lot of work on the pooter today. My eyes hurt and i feel a headache coming. Last night i called my friend Suz in Singapore. I call him Suz coz there was once a time when i could never get the spelling of his name right. His name is Szue Hann (pronounced 'se') and as a way out i would just call him Suz (actually it was from Suzannah...we used to give boys girl names..hehe). It was good to hear his voice...i haven't seen him in a while and as he won't be coming back here as his family has moved to S'pore, i miss him loads. He's like my best guy friend..i have two best friends...the other is Denise who also happens to be in S'pore in SMU..Suz is in NUS, the smartypants...these two are the one i trust everything with...not that i don't trust my other friends but these two are the ones who know me and we go a long way back. Denise and i have been best friends since primary 2 i think...and she left in F2...and i've been close to Suz since F2...i actually didnt like him in F1..thot he was too kambang coz he was like a genius and all...smartypants *mutter mutter* teehee but having a genius for a friend sure has its ups :) i'm supposed to be in church now for dance practice but since i still have lots more work to do i thot i'd stay home. tomorrow is my friend rach's bday..and her cousin's one too...they live just next door...we're kinda related but then thats another (long) story :) thinking of getting something but dunno what....hmm...anyway im gonna go eat tummy is rumbling *rumble rumble*

7:02 PM

Thursday, August 28, 2003.

music: Something Beautiful-Robbie Williams

I just love this song! it's such a feel-good song...listening to it just kinda relaxes me. I've been trying to d/l Where's the Love by B.E.P feat J.Timberlake but somehow the song ends up if the cd was all i get is some kind of ear-piercing static...*ouchie* today was another long monotonous! Feels like the same day all over again *sigh* Continued some more drawings of bones..we were singing away in the museum...nisa brought her lap top and switched the music player on so we were basically listening to and singing along to the songs...most of them were from Akademi Fantasia (Fantasy Academy) i had no idea what those songs were or who was singing them :) Suzi wasn't feeling well today...hope you're feeling better maci!
Sein still has a sore mouth...i really do wonder what he's been up to!! teehee! ;) My daleng Monne gave me a beautiful necklace today...its got a butterfly pendant with purple stones. Its so pretty :) Thank you Monne! ahhhh!!! :)
Come to think of it i'm actually stressing at the moment about our trip to Pusat Ehsan...we're supposed to go and check out the place and the days when we can make it are the days the people at P.E can't attend to us! Ahh sasak ku! And this trip is supposed to be this coming friday! eesh!!! panic panic panic!! *holds head and screams* Ok...breathe in...breathe out...something beautiful...*lalalalala*

9:41 PM

Wednesday, August 27, 2003.

mood: irritated
music: Move your feet-JrSr

im irritated for no good reason...maybe its my pms...and to think a male doctor would suggest it doesnt exist...a MALE...what would he know?! eeessshhhh....
im relieved as i'm done with my bio tutorial...usually i'm not too bad with public speaking but just now as i was waiting my turn, my heart was racing and i felt so nauseous...eurgh...but i did ok i guess...i got a 7 out of 10 :) i still have a lot more work to do but tonight i think i'll just give myself a rest...i'll be going out in a cousins are gonna watch Bad Boys II but i heard it isnt that good...i'll just wait for their opinions before i go...i'm gonna go out for supper for a while...give myself a treat! :) i think i deserve one after that nerve-wracking,agonizing experience that is my tutorial! :) teehee...

8:41 PM

Tuesday, August 26, 2003.


had a pretty tiring day...had a fun but disgusting prac today...involved dissection of a ray...some had sharks...which i think were sick of taking off my gloves to draw and putting them back on to continue dissecting so i just did it without gloves...:) ewwwwrrrr..... smelly too....all of us came out of it smelling like the pasar in Gadong i.e. fish market hahaha...okie have to prepare my bio tutorial...

8:20 PM

Saturday, August 23, 2003.

music: Reaching For You- Hillsongs Australia

today felt like forever...stayed back in the afternoon to get some work done...i hate drawing...i'm so bad at it...well, i mean i'm ok enough but when you talk about skulls and bone structure...i terribly... :) you must be wondering.."bones"?? yeah well, it was a practical...studying vertebrate internal structure and i tell you bones aren't easy to draw...arrggghhh...i ended up drawing a doggie skull looking like a dinosaur one...eeeehhh :) came home, took a nap..which lasted FOUR hours! didn't think i was that tired...but i havent had enough sleep since monday anyway and i think my body was starting to protest...
i was supposed to go out tonight but something happened at home..looong basically i'm now stuck at home...angry and depressed and trying my best not to burst into tears...*sigh*...i wish life was simpler..wait...haven't i said that before?? *sigh* anyway i should go do my english...nite

8:12 PM

Thursday, August 21, 2003.

music: Forever- Damage

two blogs in a feel like i have no life! :) life has been a rollercoaster ride lately...and still i have so many questions on my mind. My heart hurts and my spirit is crushed. I'm trying so hard to hold on to what i believe in and what i know...but sometimes the truth feels like such a lie...i'm holding on by my nails even :)
to my friends who know what i'm going through, i'm thankful for your support and for your prayers. To those who don't, believe me when i say that even though you don't know what's going on, you still make my days a whole lot brighter. Pls pray for me and my family...and also that i may have the strength to carry on and not give up. thanks guys...*hugs*

9:32 PM


mood: ok
music: This is how we overcome

been calling up lotsa ppl today...ppl at pusat friends to check about the activity we're planning...msging back and forth...and i have very little phone credit left. Luckily my "angel" was so kind enough to get me some credit...of course i will have to pay back the money but at least i have credit again :) today was was kinda tiring and a bit depressing to find out that i was all alone for lunch...not that lenny and shah weren't there but if they had gone home like they were supposed to i would have been alone for lunch...i'm glad it was just for today :) talking abt smoke...there was this funny smell as we were coming out of our faculty just now...i think it was some plastic burning and i was warily eyeing the wires plugged into the sockets as the smell seemed to come from that general direction...and right now someone is openly burning rubbish...tsk tsk the whole house will smell like smoke eurgh....i feel slightly better today...not as depressed as the past three days. Oh oh, yesterday we practised for the wedding..and it feels kinda empty without the other girls...two little girls couldnt make it so it will just be four of us dancing the Carman song and it's like soooo empty and weird...just four girls jumping abt on stage heheh...then another little girl will join us for the other five looks a little better :) the wedding will be at JPCC...and i've never been there til last night and my first impression of the place was wow...the banquet hall is so....its so huge and magnificent...magnificent and bordering on gaudy...but magnificent nevertheless.... :)i'm sure it will be a beautiful wedding...:)

5:58 PM

Wednesday, August 20, 2003.

mood: not too bad :)
music: Mandy Moore-Only Hope

so many proposals to think, no one asked me to marry them :) i just have to type out some proposals for the activities that Janet and I are organising. Talked to a seemingly nice lady on the phone from Pusat Ehsan who was more than helpful. I have to type and fax an official proposal to the manager of the place, giving him our detailed proposed programme etc etc.. and besides that i just finished typing out proposals for the youth leaders. As i've never done this before i doubt i did it correctly...oh well...i do have to day today was kinda ok. I've been so tired the past two days. I feel like my energy is draining out of me like as if i was an open tap. Maybe i should not have worn black today..sometimes black can make me feel very mysterious and sexy(ahem!) but i think today it just made my mood as dark as my clothes. Have handed in the two bio reports only to have another two more come up..and one more after Friday's prac...yes...FRIDAY...practical...pfffttt...i actually have a practice tonight at JPCC for a friend's sister's wedding on friday. We will be dancing but it's only a small group of us as the other girls are having mocks. We're dancing to two Christian songs...i only know one which is 'Now's the Time' by Carman...this will be the second time i've practised, and my last, and i only know a few lines of that song...uh oh...hopefully i can catch up... I have yet to look for more references for my english project (which i must say is a waste of time!) and here i am typing away my netcard credit...ok ok enough procrastinating...

4:55 PM

Tuesday, August 19, 2003.


today was a long day. i did not attend my first morning lecture as i didn't feel up to it. the rest of the day was pretty much uneventful. im glad a few of my friends made me laugh...laughing is good...even when you feel like you can never be happy again. my headache comes and goes...i feel mentallyand physically tired...spiritually drained...and all i can think of now is "why me, God?"...but who am i to question the will of God...and why things happen...and why i have to go through times like these...if only life was simpler...*sigh*

6:11 PM

Sunday, August 17, 2003.

mood: happily tired :)
music: Westlife-Written in the stars
Busted-Year 3000

today's my dad's bday...happy bday daddy! my cuz's bday is today as well so...happy bday! woke up early for church today. Was lazy but forced myself to go...must be a good little girl :) had brekkie then came home, did some bio, went to Girls' Brigade meeting...left early to rest...came home...made some plans...painted my nails :) made some bubbles and now here i am. i'm actually planning some activities for the youth group i belong to. its part of my assignment for the Youth Leaders School organised by the Diocese of Kuching. I'm actually leaving for Bintulu for the retreat from the 12th-14th of Sept. My friend Janet and I decided to team up and organise two so we can each write a report on either one of the activities. So far we've come up with a get-together, bring-and-share, have-fun-after-exam night...thats exams for form 3 and 5 btw. The other one is still in the works. Tentatively, its some volunteer work at Pusat Ehsan. I have yet to call up the right ppl and get things organised. Hope that works out :) besides that, i have a few assignments/reports due in the coming week...i feel a panic attack coming hahaha...oh yeah and my chatbox is finally just gonna go off and try and find something for my cursor...

6:18 PM

Saturday, August 16, 2003.

mood: happy
music: Saviour of my soul

this morning was ok even though my classes went on for four hours straight. Was quite happy today..won't tell you guys secret! muahaha! hehehe...have to save my voice later for YDM coz i'm worship leading today. I don't have a bassist today so a bit worried that it will sound a bit weird...but i think it will work out :) i'm actually losing weight! yippee! won't tell you how heavy i was and how heavy i am now...just believe me when i say that i've lost weight fat isnt easy to get rid off laaa...and my double chin...eurgh...genetics...*sigh* of all things to inherit hehehe for those of you out there who don't really know me...i must tell you now...i'm not conventionally fat...i'm just not haha..i have excess in unmentionable places haha..well, not unmentionable...just to embarassed to say. :) im still in school clothes so i'm off to change into more comfy attire...

"Earth has no sorrow that Heaven cannot hold"-Churchill

1:32 PM

Friday, August 15, 2003.


figured out (like everyone else) that my computer wasnt moody...stupid virus and stupid person who created it. do you know how much trouble you caused?! eeesh... well, hopefully this comp is fixed. i'm not getting any error msgs :) which is GOOD...i wanted to post something yesterday but we were trying to fix it yesterday. I called up one of my really good friends, Joanne. she's actually my penpal for over 6-7 years if i'm not wrong and i have never seen her face-to-face. she's a very nice person...a very good friend. She's like the only one who has been constantly writing to me all these years besides my best friend, Denise, who's in S'pore. Joanne is in KL(originally from pahang) and she just got her A level results (she's actually my year but she worked after her SPM) and she got an A and B for accounts and maths...that's like soooo good...congrats Joanne! she's not too happy with the B though and i was like screaming down the phone and saying "whaaaaaattt??! you crazy?!?!" hehehe... but yeah...i think she did well. yesterday was an ok day. I didn't realise how tired i was until i got home...i have classes from 8-12 monday to saturday. feels like sec school which shouldnt be that bad but i still have afternoon classes-not to mention two four-hour practicals a week...yuck! yuck! yuck! went out for lunch with suzi and ayu and it was quite fun and a bit scary coz suzi is a crazy driver...ok maybe crazy is a strong abt...alright...SCARY!! i hope i'm not like that when i drive....;)

1:41 PM

Wednesday, August 13, 2003.


The things we girls wear to look pretty…my feet have been strapped onto black little sandals that are about 3 inches high…makes me taller anyway which kinda negates the pain hahaha…*ouch* am afraid that my comp will shut down on me again as I assume there is something wrong with blogspot…they keep shutting me down! I’m actually typing this out on msword and then I’ll have to copy and paste and log off really quick so they won’t shut me down *mutter mutter*

stupid language corrector… keeps giving me red zig-zags under words it doesn’t like…fusspot…today I was suppose to finish at 12…well I did…but my dad only came at 3 coz he was in KB doing some work so had lunch with my friends and went off to the library for a while to do some work and then back to my faculty to do some more work…alone…the muslim students had some kerohanian lecture today…I’ll only need to attend the week after next.

OK so maybe it isn’t a problem with blogger…I just had to shut down again…can someone tell me what’s happening? They keep saying something like “generic host win32…something something call procedure disconnected…” I’m getting a bit annoyed here…

3:55 PM

Tuesday, August 12, 2003.


posted a long blog this afternoon only to have my computer shut down on me...ppfffttt...had a nice long nap this afternoon..only that it wasnt supposed to be long ehehe ;) been a lazy bum basically...except for doing some of my biology...good enough was pretty tiring...four different chem classes in a span of four hours *shudder* if i hadn't got out of my seat in between lectures, my butt would have left a lasting impression on the chair :) niceeee :) actually have a migraine right now...i blame it on the nap :) and this afternoon my wrist was bound up...coz it still resigned to the fact that it will take AGES to heal. It's not helping that i have to write notes everyday and plus i keep forgetting that it hurts so when i strain it..*ouchie* IS my right hand after all...shows how much we (well, I!) use our right hand. had a peep at my friend hussein's site...sein...its embarassing... :)

9:54 PM

Monday, August 11, 2003.


just got home from a very long day at hand hurts again..sigh...i dunno when it will ever get better...all this writing is not good for my wrist...they should ban writing in school!! hahah! yeah right...i was pretty ok...long...and hot...and boring...couldnt keep my eyes open in some of my classes...teachers can really drone on and on you know..and even if they don't they just somehow have that special knack of putting you right to sleep...what is it? i wonder if i get to learn that in my final year hahaha...a course on "How To Put Your Students To Sleep"...yeah..that will shut them up! heehee...terrible...
tonight i think i'll pretty much do some more work *shudder* i have this extra huge project to think about..and i have still have some non-school work to do...more typing..*sigh* life is so dull without work and hectic with. Hussein...if you're reading've GOT to help me with this html jargon...ahhh! alrighty to make some bubbles!!

6:51 PM

Sunday, August 10, 2003.


woke up late...well late enough... last night i went to watch the fireworks. was standing at the bridge opposite the hospital...very pretty although i wish i had someone to enjoy it with...not that my dad wasn't there...but you know what i mean. i can't seem to get my chatbox up...either it doesnt like me or i really suck at figuring out html (i believe its the latter!) duh! Actually had a little panic session when i realised i have a chem assignment due tomorrow which i forgot about..was going about looking for past year notes and trying to remember how to do the work...arggghhh....where did the time go?! seriously though...i'm starting to forget stuff...little things like reminding myself to get something from the room before i head downstairs and then finding myself at a loss as to what i forgot to bring down just as i reach the bottom of the stairs...its terrible...i feel like i'm going nuts! or maybe its age...NOOOO!!! hehehe
i didnt go to the outing right wrist was throbbing...what with three hours of writing (of which two were non-stop) it's no wonder it started to hurt...again...i have this wrist thing that keeps coming and going..i think i hurt it pretty bad once...and now it's quite weak..right hand lagi tu aiyaaah..menyusahkan only...alright then...time for a shower

6:28 PM

Saturday, August 09, 2003.


First week back at uni and already the workpile is growing...*sigh* is hectic...
upon gentle persuasion by a friend, i've decided to keep this blog thing for as long as i feel like writing :) as i'm typing this i'm very aware that no one knows abt this place haha...weirddd...typing into space...
i'm actually chewing on a piece of fruity chews (mixed berries) right tongue is now a deep shade of purple...niceee ;) YDM"s having some kind of special outing today...i don't know whats happening...don't even know if i'll be there...i just found out that they're having the lantern procession thingy tonight...hmmm...traffic is gonna be a headache around town. i'm actually looking for nice phone covers for my baby i.e. my mobile ;) i like my original pink but it's getting scratched...sakit hati ku :) anyway, i just suddenly realised that i'm rambling...but then again..this is what this space is for! :)

12:51 PM


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